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Thursday, June 30, 2005

i have a few confessions to make:




crows are STUPID birds. very fierce too. greedy crows. HATE CROWS.

i am not that perfect.

i am stress.

still stress.

i am not exactly happy. okok. trying to be ok? maybe sometimes i am.

i am no longer the person most people thought i was.

veggies are best served with water, to avoid getting harden stools

i am trying to have a peaceful temper.

i hate poly.

i hate some lecturers.

i hate year 2.

i am not longer that.

i am no longer this.

edison is cute.

i dont know what i want.

i am very stress.

i hate getting sick.

i hate being fat.

i dont like to decide food by thinking whether to have low fat healthy food or to satisfy my cravings?

INITIAL D rox!

i wanna go racing.

i want the mazda car. *errr. is that what's edison driving in that show?

edison is cute.

can somebody decide my life for me?

can i be more firm in what i want?



ok. seriously, i am indecisive about many things. food, life, people, everything! serious. i dont know why my life is full of choices. it always happen. always. always. is not that i cant make up my mind. is just that there's too many things that i want. too many.

WHY CANT I HAVE EVERYTHING?


let's say food for example. sometimes i will wanna have errr, ok. use BK as an example since that's my last meal ok? like there's currently this new chicken cheeseburger. then i love mushroom swiss too. then there's also this new chicken mushroom swiss. and yes, because i am FAT, the prawn salad is added to my choices. ha! cant decide. really cant. prawn salad will be my first choice as its low fat, but it is not as tasty except for the prawns.. hmm. then the problem is with the steeep price that bombarded me. so, its out. in my mind, i wanna eat that cos wont feel that guilty. ah well, its still out. but i still want, but.. ARGHH. in the end, wanna try the new burger? ok. two new burgers. WHICH? okok. price factor. but i arent broke. not exactly. but ah well, finally settled for the new chicken cheese burger. sucks yeah? after so much thinkin. argh! forgive me. if this may cause a problem. ('__'*)

i have many more inner thoughts. yup. i wanna be strong. i wanna be selfish. really selfish. i wanna have a heart that's strong. even my workplace there's this guy who says that i looked soft-hearted. lols. i admit i am. that's bad? yups. bad. haha. but he says is good. but well, i seriously dont know.

guess i am a lil hard to be understood too. is like maybe cause i dont understand myself too. =X well, ah well, i dont care anyway.



and of cos... life still goes on.. and on...



i wanna go back to my childhood days cos i miss my parents.. alot. them doting on me. me having those barbie dolls that i wanted, polly pockets.. all my toys collections that my dad never fail to buy for me when i wanted them.. and i miss those carefree period during childhood.. no school, studies, social skills life.. really. because life's complicated.

ah well, but just wanna say, my life now doesnt sucks.. becuase i still have my precious.. like my family, friends and of cos him.

I am bleeding inside.
10:51 PM